Tag: Lifetime

’10 to Track’ soccer matches for Saturday (9/22) – NWSL championship leads the way!

So what IS Noob?  I am Noob.  This site is Noob.   Most importantly, Noob is of two main facets:

Bringing Noobites the ten most important matches to follow, from the perspective the (well, a) newish American fan of the global game.

Noob also fancies himself to be the Sunday comics section to the rest of the more mainstream, serious soccer sites out there.  Even if it’s closer to just old Farside than any other strips.

Now, feast on a kick-ass slate of matches today!

  1. Portland Thorns vs. North Carolina Courage – National Women’s Soccer League

American women’s soccer fans, the Final you deserve is here.   Regular season #B hosts #1!   Some places might have NC listed first as the top seed, but they’re playing it in Portland because of Florence.

Portland’s Lindsey Horen was just announced as league’s Player of the Year, having finished 3rd in scoring.  NC’s Lynn Williams was runner-up in that category.  Both also sport top-notch attacking passers.

Noob thinks the difference-maker for Portland will have to be secondary scorer Christine Sinclair.  Two goals with one being by her and the Thorns will hoist the trophy.   Otherwise, the one-loss superpower Courage win.   (4:30 PM EST, Lifetime)

RESULT:   Courage   0-3       Hail to the victors!    Jessica McDonald with a pair of scores.

B.  Atlanta United vs. Real Salt Lake – Major League Soccer

League-leaders in putting points on the board, Atlanta look to extend their four-point lead in the Eastern Conference.  Meanwhile, RSL lead the Noob in riling me UP.

Original owner Dave Ricketts decided when the club was formed to tie into a club that doesn’t suck (Real Madrid).  Never mind that Madrid get to be royal because of a king’s patronage.  Rickett’s is a JetBlue board member, which is anything but monarchal in the corporate world.

Oh yeah, and they’re 5th in the West.  It’s a good matchup.  But RSL needs to lose for Noob’s belief in an omni-benevolent god in the universe to be confirmed.   (7:00 PM, ESPN+)

RESULT:   ATL   2-0

Image result for Letter B holy

 

 

 

Number B – straightening Noob out on the whole omni-benevolent God-matter.

  1. Montreal Impact vs. NYCFC – Major League Soccer

Noob’s been writing of late that Montreal have been recently and surprisingly frisky.   Turns out, they made their big move in June and early July.   We live, we learn, Noobites.  They’re in 6th, and top eight will make the Playoffs.

NYCFC are somehow still in 3rd, despite not having won a match in five weeks.  They’re in no danger of dropping out of the playoffs this late in the regular season.  But it’s looking like they need some kind of shock to the system to get them moving back up toward a top-two seed.   That wold mean multiple postseason home matches.  (7:30 PM, ESPN+)

RESULT:   1-1

  1. Manchester United vs. Wolverhampton Wanderers – English Premier League

No two teams from the table’s top are battling today in the PL, but we do get a match with two teams in strange positions.

Man Utd. have won three in a row, though that only pulls them up into 8th place.  And those victories were over two bad league teams and an overmatched Swiss side in the Champions League.

Wolverhampton have also had three wins a row, also over weaker competition (two poor PL sides and a second-division team in the EFL Cup).  They didn’t allow a goal to any of them, either.

All considered, it’s about impossible to not consider the evergreen powerhouse that is Man U the favorites.  Wolverhampton have seen some early success after having been Promoted, but they have to score more than a single goal per match to keep it up.

RESULT:   1-1     Or maybe one per game can keep you afloat!   On a side note, Man Utd’s goal was scored by “Fred”.   Yup.  Just Fred.

Image result for wolverhampton wanderers funny

 

 

Feel about it how you will, Wolvers, Noob calls it as seen.

  1. Toluca vs. Necaxa – Liga MX

Another league dear to our hearts that isn’t featuring a 1-B matchup or anything close.  But we have what I have called a “Hiccup Watch”.

Toluca is 5th here in the Apertura (first half-season).  Top eight make the Playoffs.  By table position, Necaxa should be toast on the road.

Thing is, they haven’t lost to Toluca in many consecutive matches.  Noob’s not convinced Toluca an avoid having a Hiccup tonight.  Momentum, inertia – powerful forces.  (6:00 PM, ESPN Deportes)

RESULT:   Toluca   3-2

  1. Schalke 04 vs. Bayern Munich – Germany Bundesliga

Last year’s #B and #1 face off!  The exclamation point could be overkill in a way, though.

Schalke have lost all three of its matches to start the new league year.  More, none of those opponents were teams that finished anywhere near the top in 2017-18.  Noob’s not ready to call their 1-1 Champions League home draw against Portugal’s FC Porto a sign that everything is turned around now.

Bayern are 3-0-0, doing Bayern-y things to all.  (12:30 PM, FS2)

RESULT:   Bayern   0-2

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Ummmm…

Isn’t anything we do Bayern-y by definition? 

Can we do otherwise?

  1. Al Ahly vs. Horoya AC – CAF Champions League

Not long ago, Noob Tracked the first match of this two-legged Quarterfinal.   Africa’s greatest team went to Guinean Horoya and only got a 0-0 draw.  By ELO ratings, this is a team the Egyptians should utterly wreck, no matter whose pitch their playing on.

Still, now they get to take care of business at home.  Perhaps they won’t assume Horoya will just lay down for them this leg.

RESULT:   Al -Ahly    4-0    

  1. Pittsburgh Riverhounds vs. Indy Eleven – United Soccer League

Noob tends to shy away a little from second division leagues on weekends, even Amuricuh’s.   Just sooo much D1 football here and the world over.

But “an opening” was created when one of the teams in a Nadeshiko 1 match I’d pre-listed dropped too far in the standings to meet Noob’s exacting criteria.  Match 8 was going to be three-time defending champion NTV Beleza hosting Noob-fave Urawa Red Diamond Ladies.  Alas, Urawa has slipped to midtable.

RESULT:   Pitt   3-2

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I got the word, Noob!

Urawa’s #1 U.S. supporter and unofficial spokesman mascot is back once again.

<—  Where the sushi goes.

 

 

Sorry, The Situation.  I know you were excited.  Don’t worry, you’ll still get your appearance fee.

Image result for The Situation angry

 

 

I’d better!   I’m still waiting for them all from last season.

 

Check, er, checks are in the mail, The Situation.

Aaaaanyway, Pitt and Indy are 3rd and 5th-place in the USL Eastern Conference.  Top eight make the Playoffs.  Top four get home-pitch advantage to start out.

Riverhounds are the class of the entire league, defensively.  Thankfully, not just by taking the air out of the ball, they score more than a little.  Indy are more balanced, but seem like they’ve peaked in what they can achieve.  Their D is just mediocre.

  1. Coleraine vs. Linfield – Northern Ireland Football League Premier

It’s merely semi-pro ball, one of Europe’s lower-ranked leagues.  But Western Europe is always on Noob’s radar.  These are two perennial powers, #1 and #3 in the early season-table.  They’re also the only two who haven’t yet lost.

RESULT:   0-0     That’s one boring way to make sure you each stay undefeated.

# Honorable Mention:    At odds with Noob’s desire to keep things mostly D1 on weekends is my utter inability to stay away from shiny 1-B matchups.  So before we wrap up, Noob sends the hippest of shouts out (shout outs?) to Ross County and Inverness of Scotland’s second-tier Championship League, #B and #1 there.  Go fight win!

  1. Hiroshima vs. FC Tokyo – Japan J1 League

Hiroshima looked ready to run away with the league title not too far back.   And while they haven’t played poorly the last month, they’ve scuffled just enough to give hope to more traditionally great Kawasaki.  They’re better on both sides of the ball than #3 FCT.

But a loss – hardly unthinkable – and that Kawasaki group could pull to within a point of the league lead.

RESULT:   1-1

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So long from Hiroshima!   

Try to visit when you can catch the Flower Festival.

’10 to Track’ soccer matches for Saturday (9/15) – the most footyball ever covered on Noob

“The ten most important matches to follow, for us – the newish American fans of the global game”.  Oh ho, Noob’s cheating today.

The list of the previews-proper are still ten   But we’re directly acknowledging three times as many Track-worthy matches today!

Gorge, Noobites.  Feeeast!!

  1. Portland Thorns vs. Seattle Reign – National Women’s Soccer League Playoffs

At last, the postseason!  These are the #B and #3 seeds of the four teams participating.

In their last match of the regular season, Portland beat Seattle to secure their runner-up status.  Their reward is getting to host today’s one-off.  There will be no return trip to Seattle.  The other two times they met in 2018, the matches were in Seattle, which won them both.

Portland is the more offensively-minded group by far, will look to push the pace hard.  The most likely names to see pairing up for scores are Lindsey Horan and Tobin Heath, second and first in league goals and assists, respectively.

For Seattle, their defensive player of the year Rebekah Scott will have her hands full.   She plays outside back, a position from which she can often feed their offensive threat, Megan Rapinoe.  Noob’s not sure she’ll be anything but pinned back on defense today though.   (3:00 PM EST, Lifetime)

RESULT:   Portland   2-1       Horan and Heath each scored.  

B.  FC Dallas vs. Columbus Crew – Major League Soccer

This is just one of three Track-worthy MLS matches on the day.  Noob’s highlighting this one for a couple reasons.

First – Dallas are still #1 in the Western Conference, having wrested the spot away from Kansas City midseason.  Surprising – their play has been incredibly spotty.  They just had a nice home win over rivals Houston last match, yet have lost twice to San Jose since August.  (The ‘Quakes can’t beat almost anyone else.  Ever.)  The offense and defense both come and go.

Second – how much longer will Noob get to type “Columbus Crew” without it being an historical reference?  Their ownership moving them to Austin is hardly a done deal, but it remains a likelihood.

As for their current season, they’re #4 in the East with plenty of table-space above and below.  They just got a big confidence boost taking down #3 NYCFC.  Noob wonders if they might night find today’s a trap game of sorts.    (8:00 PM, ESPN+)

Other MLS matches:   *Philadelphia Union vs. Montreal Impact – The East’s #5 and #6 fight to stay there, the conference’s final playoff spots;  *Vancouver Whitecaps vs. Seattle Sounders – the West’s #6 and #7, separated by one little point in the table.  Seattle have won eight straight.

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Yes, Number B.  You got to feature three matches.

And so three of you.  Well-done.

  1. CF America vs. Monarcas Morelia – Liga MX

It warms the cockles of a Noob-heart to see Morelia struggling.   While I feel far more strongly anti-royalty with American-named clubs than Mexico, there’s still no kings and queens in N.A.  Foolishness!  Go, CFA!

Club America are in a four-way tie for 3rd place at nearly the halfway point here in the Apertura (first half-season).  They’re the strongest of them, too, in goal differential and INHO.  They’d been struggling a touch, but a trip to lowly Lobos BUAP was just what was needed last match (0-2 win).

Morelia hasn’t won in a month.  Their defense makes the sad.   (8:00 PM, Univision)

Other Mexican matches of note:   *Pumas UNAM vs. Tijuana  — in Liga MX Femenil, Pumas are #4 in their Group.  Top two from each will make the playoffs.  They’re in the mix, but the least of the best there.   Tijuana are in 6th;   Zacatecas vs. Atlante – second-division Ascenso MX #1 and #3.

RESULT:   CF America   2-1

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Credit to Dan – the former Intern-o Inferno – for showing us just how lowly BUAP truly is.

  1. Tottenham Sir Topham Hatt Hotspur vs. Liverpool – English Premier League

Last year’s #3 and #4 face off.

Liverpool have won all four of their early matches this season, though the toughest team they’ve faced is probably Leicester (meh).   Hotspur thrashed Man Utd – on the road, no less – then turned right around and threw it away with a loss to Watford.  They’re both likely to be in the title chase for a while, contend for top-four finishes, Champions League berths.

Since it’s a new season, allow Noob to explain to less-tenured Noobites about the strikethrough.   Tottenham Hotspur is named for Harry “Hotspur” Percy.  He was an historic traitor, flipflopping multiple times with his loyalties.  He was a scalawag and ne’er-do-well and Noob will carry no truck with such!

Good thing that didn’t get weird at the end…   (7:30 AM, NBCSN)\

RESULT:   Liverpool   1-2

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Shewsbury – the site of Percy’s death by arrow – is hallowed ground 

  1. 1 de Agosto vs. TP Mazembe – CAF Champions League

This is the first leg of a Quarterfinal tie.

Angola’s representative host first.   Their domestic league is on the rise, looks to jump from 17th to a top-10 spot in the African rankings next year.  TP Mazembe plays out of DR Congo’s top league, #3-best in Africa.  1dG would be doing well to get a draw at home.  To have a chance at advancing, they’ll have to.

Today’s other QF:   Esperance vs. Etoile du Sahel – Tunisia’s two best clubs face off.  They don’t keep them apart in the draws there I guess.  They’re both a lot better than the two featured teams above.

RESULT:   0-0

  1. FC Olexandria vs. Shakhtar Donetsk – Ukraine Premier

Ukraine’s top flight have climbed to #8 among domestic league in Europe.  Noobites should know something about this bunch.  We feature matches from their frequently.

And so, welcome to the Track, FCO!   Almost 100% sure this is the first time they’ve been featured.   They were mid-table all last season.  Seven matches into 2018-19, they’re #B.  But the current and historic #1 comes to town today to test their mettle.    Shakhtar average 2.5 goals a match, roughly.

Other top #1-#B UEFA matchups:  *Slovan Bratislava vs. Dunajska Streda — #1 hosts #B in what should be a shootout in Slovakia’s Super Liga;  Ferencvaros vs. Budapest Honved — #1 hosts #B in the Hungarian NB 1.  Honved will try and slow down the only team in the league averaging over two goals per match.

RESULT:   Donetsk   0-2

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No, FC Olexandria – Noob applauds YOU for being Track-worthy

  1. Stjarnan vs. Breioablik – Iceland FA Cup

Their league might not be even as highly-rated as the honorable mentions in Track match #6, but Noob’s always down for a Cup Final!

A question plaguing Noob is:  how much do these clubs care about the FA Cup?   It can be legitimately asked anywhere, at least by those of us who are truly noob.  Nowhere have I heard or read thy’re considered anything but a moderate to distant second in importance to the league title.

It’s especially relevant here, as Iceland’s Urvalsdeild league gets only one Champions League invite and these two are #B and #3.  Stjarnan, in fact, is just a point behind league-leaders Valur.  Will they play all starters in pursuit of this trophy, or save energy for the home stretch of their league season?

Today’s championship match is at the National Stadium in Reykjavik.  If they’re both playing full strength, Stjarnan have to be considered at last a 3:2 fave to win in regulation.

RESULT:   Stjarnan   0-0  /  4-1   pens

  1. Santa Gema vs. Independiente – Panama Football League

Noob’s been making a concerted effort here during the second year of this site to pay greater attention to all CONCACAF leagues.  And #1-#B matches shine like the sun.   This is one!

If the current pattern holds, this league is going to have one heckuva title race in 2018-19.   They’re just a few matches in, but good golly these teams end their matches in lots of draws!   Noob’s not sure if the league as a whole lacks offensive talent or if the general strategy employed there is defense.  Either way, they don’t see a ton of goals.

Saint Gema are the only undefeated team remaining, but have won just four of seven.  Independiente trail them by three points in the table.

RESULT:   Independiente    0-2       And we have a new #1!

The other #1-#B CONCACAF matchup:  *Fruta Conquerors vs. Guyana Defense Force – Guyana’s GFF Elite League – The Conquerors have an outrageous 48-5 GD.  Still, halfway through the season, they lead GDF by just five in the table.

Image result for pay attention soccer funny

 

Noob just said CONCACAF leagues are getting more attention here.  

Warning unwarranted.

  1. Kawasaki Frontale vs. Consadole Sapporo – Japan J1 League

The defending champs from Kawasaki are #B now, 2/3 of the way through the 2018 season.  Even so, they’re way off Hiroshima’s pace.

Sapporo were below mid-table last year, have improved mightily to be the current #4.  Last season, that would’ve been good enough to get them into the AFC Champions League.  Not this year.  Just the top three now.

Noob’s uncertain if the AFC is distributing more bids to lower-ranked countries’ leagues now, or if J1 League lost a slot due to a drop in confederation ranking.  Regardless, Sapporo need to play far better defense if they want to be in any postseason discussion.

RESULT:   Kawasaki   7-0    not a typo

Before we hit #10, Noob’s including some Honorable Mention matches.  Every one one of them involves two teams in the top quarter (or top three) of their leagues (at least as of five days ago), or there are specific playoff implications:

*USL – conference #2 Pittsburgh Riverhounds vs. #4 Louisville FC, plus #6 Swope Park Rangers vs. #9 Saint Louis FC;  Poland Ekstraklasa — Wisla Krakow vs. Lechia Gdansik was a #1 vs. #B when scouted a few days ago, but two teams which have played an extra match leapfrogged W.K.;  English Football Championship — #6 Bristol City and #3 Sheffield United would be in the second-divisions Promotion playoff tournament were the season over today.

Belgium First Division A — #B Genk vs. #3 Anderlecht;  Norway Eliteserien – #B FK Haugesund vs. #3 Brann;  Belarus Premier – #4 Shakhtyor Soligorsk vs. #3 Dinamo Minsk;  Slovenia Prva Liga — #B Aluminij vs. #3 Gorica;  Uruguay Primera – #B Nacional vs. #3 Montevideo Wanderers; two other Cup tournaments in early action include Portugal’s Taca de Liga and the Swiss FA Cup.

  1. Maldives vs. India – SAFF Championship

The Final!

Asia’s continental football confederation also has several sub-associations.  The South Asian Football Federation holds a Championship every other year.  It’s a standalone event for the current seven member nations, meaning it has no effect on qualifying for any other tournaments.

These are national teams that just aren’t going to see much of any success in most any other field of play.  Three of the seven are in the bottom ten in all Asia.  Two are the very bottom.  Our Finalists are the most-highly ranked in the world, just #150 and #96.  India would be even better, but.  You know.  Cricket.

RESULT:   Maldives   2-1    Upset city!

Image result for Dhaka weirdThey’ve been hosting this tournament Dhaka, Blangadesh.

Come back, Bear Grylls!

’10 to Track’ soccer matches for Saturday (5/12) – MLS, top UEFA league’s drama, and more FA Cup Finals!

The ten most important matches for us – the newish American fans of the global game – brook no nonsense (ok, maybe a little nonsense…) on the weekends.  There’s hardware to be passed out today, so let’s dive in.

  1. Columbus Crew vs. Chicago Fire – MLS

Noob originally had Dallas and LA Galaxy for the top game today, but it’s a save over the crossbar!  Correct best game identified.

Columbus are #4 in the Eastern Conference, have seemingly righted their ship.  They lost three straight matches before this unbeaten streak of four.  Chicago are having trouble on offense.  Four assists out of their aged Euro-star Bastian Schweinsteiger isn’t bad, but he’s stuck on one goal for the season.   (7:30 PM Eastern, NBA League Pass 6)

Noobstradamus Sees:   Columbus 1-0 on an early goal.   Columbus doesn’t score much, either, but they’re tied for the conference lead in goal defense.

RESULT:   Columbus 3-0

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Do you have a question, Bastian?   Noob’s spot-on.

B.  Portland Thorns vs. Orlando Pride – NWSL

Orlando have won four in a row!  That’s pushed them to 5th place, but Noob thinks the soccer gods are lulling them into a false sense of accomplishment.    (3:30 PM, Lifetime)

Noobstradamus Sees:   …#4 Portland repeating their 2-1 home win from earlier this season versus the Pride.  Down with cities built on swamps!

RESULT:   Orlando   1-2

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Number B – menacing with a thorny look

  1. Middlesbrough vs. Aston Villa – English Championship

The battle is on to determine which of the #3-6 clubs will get the third and final Promotion into Premier League for next season!  This is the first leg of a semifinal between, as you might imagine, two very even sides.

Noobstrdamus Sees:   1-1.  Saving the real drama for the return leg at Aston Villa.

RESULT:   Aston Villa 0-1

  1. 1899 Hoffenheim vs. Borussia Dortmund – Bundesliga

This is the last weekend of matches in Germany!  Reminder:  Four Champions League berths for this league.

#3 Dortmund are all but guaranteed one now, as they lead #4’s Hoffenheim and Leverkusen by three points each.  Might explain why they lost to lowly Mainz at home last match.

Hoffenheim is hoping their hosts today will be sleeping again.  Leverkusen play at home against also-ran Hannover today.   (9:30 AM, KTBC)

Noobstradamus Sees:   Hoffenheim 2-0, leaving Leverkusen having to utterly blowout Hannover to pass them.

RESULT:   Hoffenheim   3-1

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He’s even in a yellow BVB jersey, see?

  1. AS Monaco vs. St. Etienne – Ligue 1

Monaco are tied for 3rd place and the final CL slot for France.  But they’ve got this and one more match to play, whereas their peer Marseille are down to just one.

St. Etienne may be #6 and fighting to hold onto their Europa League slot, but there’s a massive gulf in ability between the league’s top four and everyone else.   (3:00 PM, TV5MONDE)

Noobstradamus Sees:   …Monaco leaving nothing to chance.  5-1.

RESULT:   1-0

  1. Inter Milan vs. Sassuolo – Serie A

With two matches to go in Italy, it’s Inter who are losing the game of musical chairs.  They’re in 5th, two points out of 4th and the final CL spot.  They have a possibly sneaky-tough matchup today as #12 Sassuolo have only lost once since mid-March.

Noobstradamus Sees:   …that the competition Sassy-pants have been playing of late is decidedly not the league’s strongest.  Inter 3-0.

RESULT:   Sassuolo   1-2

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Snausages!

Noob neither has nor needs any reason.

  1. Galatasaray vs. Yeni Malatyaspor – Turkey Super Lig

Hiccup Watch game.  Y.M. are 10th place, should be fodder for tied-for-1st Galatasaray.

Noobstradamus Sees:   …Galatasaray – who have two matches left to just one for co-#1 Istanbul Basaksehir – not giving up that advantage.  4-1.

RESULT:   Galatasaray   2-0

  1. AEK Athens vs. PAOK – Greek Cup

The Final!  Athens get to host, no neutral site business here.  And it’s the league #1 vs. #B, as is good, right, and proper.   (1:30 PM, Antenna 20 Years)

Noobstradamus Sees:   Massive fires in Athens, a couple of maimings… it’s Greece!   Oh, and PAOK gets the upset, 1-1, then taking it in PK’s.  So make that several maimings.

RESULT:   PAOK   0-2

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Hold up.   Did someone say snausages?   Yummaaaay.

  1. HJK vs. FC Inter – Finnish Cup

Another Final!   This one shouldn’t be dramatic, truth be told.  HJK Helsinki are the league defending champions.  FC Inter are a bottom-half club who achieved nicely by getting to this match.

Noobstradamus Sees:   HJK 11-1.

  1. Sporting Cristal vs. Huancayo – Peru Premier

Let’s end the Track with one more Final!   This is the championship for the Verano (first of three regular season stages).  Cristal earned a 1-1 draw on the first leg of this two-match tie.  They are likely considered a full goal-better than Huancayo on their own pitch.   (9:30 PM, Peru Magico)

Noobstrdamus Sees:  …that funny things happen in footyball!  2-2 today, then the visitors take the title in penalty kicks.

RESULT:   Cristal 1-0     chamPEENS!

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So long from Peru–  from Noob and controversial Peruvian TV character “Peasant Jacinta”!

’10 to Track’ soccer matches for Saturday (4/21) – MLS, UEFA leagues, bad Zlatan-wear

The ten most important matches for us, the newish American fans.  Things go from important to absolutely paramount in Europe when the seasons are hitting their climaxes.

Before we get to those – ‘Muricuh!

  1. L.A. Galaxy vs. Atlanta United – MLS

What a different a year can make!   The talk if the league is the Galaxy’s signing of international megastar striker Zlatan Ibrahimovich, but it’s actually their defense that has that #B in the West.

Atlanta United will test that defense.  They’re #3 in the tougher Eastern Conference.  The game kicks off 9:00 PM Eastern on NBA League Pass 6.

RESULT:   ATL   0-2

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Now that he’s in L.A., I guess he can stop wearing crazy lady’s gift sweater.

B.  Columbus Crew vs. New England Revolution – MLS

Your Major League Soccer undercard pits the #4 team in the East against #3.  The Revs have improved their defense after missing the playoffs last season.  They’d been on quite a roll until getting skunked at home by Dallas.

Columbus have been skunkier though, not scoring in consecutive matches and losing three straight.  But they’ve been creating chances, getting a little unlikely hitting wood repeatedly.  Noob strongly feels the Crew will right their ship today.   (7:30 PM, NBA League Pass 7)

RESULT:   2-2

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Number B, about to learn a hard lesson about skunkiness.

  1. North Carolina Courage vs. Utah Royals – NWSL

The good news for expansion Utah – they’ve only allowed two goals in three matches.  The bad news – they’ve only scored once.  The worse news – they travel to defending regular season champions Courage today.   (3:30 PM, Lifetime)

RESULT:   1-1

  1. Necaxa vs. UANL Tigres – Liga MX

Tigres are tied for 3rd with just three Clausura (second half-season) matches to go, but they have yet to secure a top-eight, postseason Liguilla spot.  Tigres are part of a three-way tie for 9th place, just a point shy of 8th.

Neither team gives up many goals.  If you like defense, this one is available to ogle at 10:00 PM on ESPN Deportes.

RESULT:   1-1

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The Mexican Hornet Defense.

Really, it’s called that.

  1. Manchester United vs. Tottenham Sir Topham Hatt Hotspur – FA Cup

Noob-reviled, traitorously-named Hotspur face off against Man Utd in the Semifunal, at Wembley (neutral). Man U’s  slight edge on defense  should make them a winner today.  (12:15 PM, Fox Deportes)

RESULT:   Man U   2-1

  1. Barcelona vs. Sevilla – Copa del Rey

It’s the Final!  Sevilla have had a tremendous run in Spain’s FA Cup, especially given that they’re only in 7th in La Liga.  That run ends today in Madrid, and won’t end well for them.  Barcelona have yet to lose a league match all year.  Barca by two feels right.   (3:30 PM, ESPNEWS)

RESULT:   Barca   5-0

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  1. RB Leipzig vs. 1899 Hoffenheim – Bundesliga

With four matches to go, that is also the number of points by which Leipzig trail 4th place Borussia Dortmund for the league’s last Champions League invite.  Hoffenheim (and Frankfurt) in turn only trail Leipzig by a point.

Leipzig are hardly falling apart, but Hoffenheim are peaking at the perfect time.  They’ve not lost in seven straight matches.  If they can push the ball today, a pivotal road win should be in their grasp.   (9:30 AM, Fox Soccer Plus)

RESULT:   Hoffenheim   2-5     Hoffenheim move into 5th

  1. SPAL 2013 vs. AS Roma – Serie A

Roma, Lazio, and Inter – one’s not going to Champions League.  The race for the last two of the four CL slot Italy is tight and then some.  Roma and Lazio are tied, with Inter lurking just a point behind.

SPAL are only one slot above the Relegation Zone, so they are not without a reason to fight.  They can’t score in general, and they’re unlikely to against defensive juggernaut Roma.   (9:00 AM, beIN Sports)

RESULT:  Roma 0-3

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Meaning?  No clue.

Terrified?  You betcha.

  1. Shakhtar Donetsk vs. Vorskla – Ukraine Premier

This the #8 league in Europe, a real rising power, getting two CL berths this year.  They’ve replaced Poland as Noob’s under-the-radar league to watch.

Shakhtar are the goal-scoring giant here.  Vorskla are in 3rd, and have overachieved in getting there.  They won’t score today, get run roughshod over.

RESULT:   S.D.   4-2

  1. Phoenix Rising vs. Swope Park Rangers – USL

Noob loves him some second-tier footyball.  On the weekend, though, usually their matches give way to top-flight leagues.  I’d scouted a sweet UAE match with which to finish today’s Track, but Al Nasr has since fallen out of the top quarter of their league table.  Denied!

These both made the playoffs last year.  Just a handful of games into this season, they’re in position again.  That said, Rangers appear to have fallen off defensively.  A lot.  Noobstradamus says Phoenix’s offensive will finally break out, net them a 3-1 win today.

RESULT:   2-2

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Phoenix Rising are about to get hot.  But it’ll be a dry heat.