Isle of Sodor Premier League – final matchday results (38) – the champs get formally crowned, last minute Relegation mayhem

Fin.    Europe’s newest Premier League has completed its inaugural season.  Isle of Sodor aren’t in FIFA.   No clubs here qualify for anything internationally.   No giant piles of money are awarded.  Blessedly, it’s just been high-scoring, fun footy.

Image result for train trophyKeep watching this space in the coming weeks.   While Noob’s site audience has been limited in reach, the Sudric FA seems content with growing their international exposure at whatever pace comes naturally.   So I have been given the option to continue exclusive coverage, which would continue with the summer’s second annual IoS FA Cup.  Or Noob may just continue living here, but work on unrelated novel and screenwriting projects already underway.  Time will tell.

Here are the Matchday 38 results.  And here’s your weekly smexy Table link.

Sunday, 5/26 – 1:00 PM UTC
#1   Dryaw                         4    vs.   5    #11  Marron
#14  Castle Rolf              5    vs.   3     #6   Crovan’s Gate
#12  Lakeside                  6    vs.   8    #18  Ulfstead
#19  Tidmouth City      9    vs.   1     #8   Wellsworth
#20  Arlesburgh Utd.   2    vs.   8    #7   East Coast Diesel

Sun., 5/25 – 4:00 PM UTC
#13  Vicarstown              3    vs.   3    #15  Brendam Harbor
#5   Junction & Sheds   1    vs.   0    #16  Ffarquhar
T9   Suddery                     3    vs.   2    #17  Brendam Utd.
#4   Kirk Ronan              4    vs.   5     #3   Knapford Town
T9   Glennock                  5    vs.   5     #2   Peel Godred

Matchday 38 in Highlights

* Relegation madness til the bitter end! Ulfstead won the shootiest shootout of the day, 6-8 at Lakeside. Coupled with Brendam United's 2-3 loss at Suddery, this means U.F.C. climb over B-Utd, sending the latter into 18th and down into next season's Championship.

* With their sixth straight win, Marron secure the last top-half finish, clawing their way over Glennock.

* The season finishes with ties at both 2nd and 4th place. (no goal differential or other tiebreakers in Sudric soccer)

* One more special highlight for champions Dryaw F.C. at the bottom of this final 2018-19 IoS PL post

Feature Match recapUlfstead win match, earn Relegation reprieve

Image result for Norramby crestGotta call this one like it was.   Ulfstead‘s 6-8 win over Lakeside looked closer than it really was.   Lakeside had a three-match win streak on their side, but Ulfstead had motivation — trying to make the Premier League for 2019-20.

Image result for Lakeside FC crestThey also had revenge on their minds, having lost at home by an embarrassing 0-8 margin in the season’s first matchup with “The Quarrysiders“.  This one was 0-4 at the half, and went to 1-7 by 70′.  Lakeside‘s reserves got some goals against Ulfstead‘s bench late, made the margin respectable.

Coming into this final Matchday, U.F.C. trailed Brendam United by a point for 17th place.  Bottom three of the PL‘s 20 get Relegated to the Championship, so one might’ve thought they’d be tight at the outset.   But no, everyone was loose.   And Noob means everyone.    Seven starters scored for Ulfstead!

Ulfstead played one of the early matches, so their survival would depend on the late SudderyBrendam Utd. match result.   Lakeside A.F.C. officials were wonderful sports, extending an invite for everyone to stay and listen to that match’s radio broadcast over the grounds sound system.  Players and fans from both clubs intermingled throughout the stands .   The concessions folks stayed late.  Lakeside folks congratulated U.F.C. on getting above the cutline as Suddery won the dramatic 3-2 barnburner.

Image result for Isle of Sodor flag

THAT is the heart of football on Sodor.  Noob can think of no finer note on which to end… except one.   🙂

Image result for Dryaw FCCongratulations one last time to 2018-19 IoS PL champions Dryaw F.C.!   Don’t ask Noob from how it was acquired, but in return for getting to be Sodor FA’s exclusive coverage home, I gifted them what they used for the classiest championship trophy ever.

Image result for BET Soul Train Award trophy

 

You’re darn tootin’ (pun intended) that’s a BET Soul Train Awards trophy.

 

Thanks for reading, Noobites.

Isle of Sodor Premier League – matchday 38 preview – the end of 2018-19; though a champion is crowned, so much at stake

Matchday 38.   The bittersweet end to the Isle  of Sodor’s first-ever Premier League season.  The country’s FA-era seems to have gotten off to a bright start.

Image result for train trophy Noob hopes you’ve enjoyed the exclusive coverage found here.  Nothing is finalized, but I hope to continue the coverage into the summer’s FA Cup and then beyond into 2019-20 PL season number two.   (After all, I did up and move here permanently this spring!)

Oh!  And next week we visit the IoS Champions League.   It’s nearly time for their Promotion Playoffs!

Here’s the weekend’s full slate.  Teams bolded in blue are still in contention for a top-10 finish.  Those in red are still trying to avoid the last Relegation slot (18th).   Those in purple are still vying for a final top-four position.  (Not that it qualifies them for anything, but it has a certain cachet.)

Sun., 5/25 – 1:00 PM UTC
#1   Dryaw                        vs.     #11  Marron
#14  Castle Rolf              vs.     #6   Crovan’s Gate
#12  Lakeside                  vs.     #18  Ulfstead 
#19  Tidmouth City      vs.     #8   Wellsworth
#20  Arlesburgh Utd.   vs.     #7   East Coast Diesel

Sun., 5/25 – 4:00 PM, UTC
#13  Vicarstown              vs.    #15  Brendam Harbor
#5   Junction & Sheds   vs.   #16  Ffarquhar
T9   Suddery                     vs.   #17  Brendam Utd.
#4   Kirk Ronan              vs.     #3  Knapford Town
T9  Glennock                   vs.     #2   Peel Godred

Feature Match:   #12 Lakeside vs. #18 Ulfstead

Image result for Lakeside FC crest

Hello from Lakeside, Sodor!   Was it tempting for Noob to remain in village Dryaw after they clinched the Title last week?  Of course.   But with the trophy decided, it was time to visit, introduce Noobites to a location new to us.

Lakeside A.F.C. could still finish in a tie for 9th or 10th place.  #18 Ulfstead visits, a point out of Relegation safety.  More on the match in a bit.

Image result for Sodor mapLakeside is the biggest village in its area in NE-central Sodor.   That’s not saying a ton, population-wise.   Still, the club there have been slated for Premier League inclusion since the FA first started planning.   Most picked them to finish around 16th.

They’ve been able to surpass expectations by not having any other PL competition anywhere close by.  The nearby villages of Rheneas and Skarloey have their own Championship-level clubs, but the best around there play for “L.A.F.C.” now.

Image result for blue drawbridge

Village Lakeside has a beautiful blue drawbridge, or bascule bridge at the lake port.  The local train line loops the lake and is quite scenic from the high-ledge side.  But the bit of local tourism is not the central to the economy there, nor is the lake fishing.

Lakeside’s primary trade comes from its shale quarry.  Near to Lakeside proper is Lakeside Junction, a place where several narrow rails come together for shipping it out.   Enough residential and business building has developed there that it’s almost its own small village.  All but the youngest locals still call the area by its original name though —  the odd “Quarry Siding”.  And so this is where L.A.F.C. gets it’s unique nickname – the Quarrysiders.

Image result for quarrymenAnd how have they fared of late?   Four wins straight!  They’ve finally found their offensive stride in recent matches after a long, slowish start.  In fact, two matches ago they walloped Ulfstead on the road 0-8.  The last team to defeat them were newly-crowned PL champions Dryaw FC.

Image result for Norramby crestLakeside trail the teams ahead of them by two and three points.  Ulfstead only trail the team ahead of them – Brendam United – by one.   This is the more important position.  They have to make up that point to avoid a bottom-three finish and getting Relegated to the Championship for next season.

U.F.C. got a nifty win over then-#6 East Coast Diesel 5-2 on Wednesday.  That broke a three-loss skid and proved they could still find the back of the net.    That had been all but an impossible challenge of late.

Noob’s call:     Lakeside may be the more talented team and have a bit more momentum on their side.   But Wednesday, Ulfstead proved they’re serious about trying to stay up.   Beating a rugged, aggressive, defensive side in E.C.D. is no small feat for any group.   Ulfstead will earn a point, creating a possible Relegation Playoff scenario with Brendam Utd.   3-3 today.

Isle of Sodor Premier – early evening Matchday 37 results are in … and a champion is crowned!

updated 11:50 PM ET, 5/23

The celebration is on at Dryaw FC!     With just Matchday 38 to play (Sun., 5/26), they now lead Peel Godred FC by four.    Here’s a smexy link to the updated table.

Image result for Dryaw FC Dryaw may not have gotten the full three points, but coupled with PGFC‘s loss, it was enough!   The Isle of Sodor has its first ever champion of their new FA era.   Noob’s not crying.  You’re crying.

Dryaw‘s match-tying E.T. goal deprived Ffarquhar of a season-defining win.  Still, the point earned was just enough was to stake FFC a four-point lead over #18 Ulfstead.   The last Relegation slot in the table is now a battle just between Ulfstead and #17 Brendam United, who lead them by two.

**The weekend’s “Feature Match” recap is now below the results.**

Here are all the results from Wednesday’s historic day:

Wednesday, 5/22 – 6:00 PM UTC

#1     Dryaw                          3    vs.    3    #17  Ffarquhar
#6     Junction & Sheds   4    vs.    2    #15  Brendam Harbor
#20  Arlesburgh Utd.      2    vs.    4   #12  Lakeside
#4    Kirk Ronan                4    vs.    2     T9  Glennock
#13  Vicarstown                 4    vs.    3     #2   Peel Godred

Wed., 5/22 – 8:00 PM (UTC) 
#19  Tidmouth City          2    vs.     1     #14  Castle Rolf
#17  Brendam Utd.            4    vs.    2      #3   Knapford Town
#5   Crovan’s Gate             4    vs.    8    #11  Marron
#18  Ulfstead                        5    vs.    2     #7  E.C.D.
T9   Suddery                         6    vs.    6     #8  Wellsworth

Feature Match in Review:      Marron stays red hot with SIXTH straight win!

Image result for MFC crestA double brace (six goals) by Marron striker Finlay Creamer led his club to a resounding 4-8 win at then-#5 Crovan’s Gate Wednesday night.  The win is Marron‘s straight!   They remain in 11th, but are now in position to possibly overtake 10th place on the final Matchday for a top-half finish.   CGFC drops to 6th.

The Scottish national and scoring wizard danced through Crovan Gate‘s defense early and often, beginning in the 9’.   Creamer had two goals and the team four before CGFC finally broke through for one, just before the half.

Image result for CGFC crestCrovan’s Gate improved after the break.   In the first half, they simply couldn’t maintain enough possession to employ their trademark whiplash-quick changes of offensive formation.  For the second 45, Marron relaxed just a little and the hosts were able to put some things together, pulling as close as 3-5.

But Creamer & Co. were able to push through three more in the last several minutes.  CGFC had to bring everyone forward late, which allowed the rout.

Image result for amateur soccer scorerCreamer was in a class of his own, scoring in open space from distance with a rocket leg as well from up close.  He even notched an assist on a well-lofted corner kick.   Marron already knows they need to lock him up.  Home calls, and Scottish League Two club Albion Rovers (Coatbridge, North Lanarkshire) have expressed interest in acquiring him.  (Hey, when you second-to-last in Scotland’s semi-professional fourth tier of football, you look anywhere.)

The 28 year-old’s masterful performance puts him at 51 goals on the season.    (A lot by any stretch, but remember that Sudric football doesn’t focus much in defense.  At all.)

"It was something special. I took the ball and then I tried to move forward. In the box it was hard for the defense, since no one likes to touch each other," Creamer told Noob after the match, in what I can only describe as an awkward turn of phrase on his part.

Image result for Dryaw FCNext up for for Marron is their final match of the season – at #1 Dryaw FC.   It’s hard to say how Dryaw will come out, given that they’ve now wrapped up the league title, leaving this one a coronation match of sorts.  Marron trail Glennock and Suddery by just a point as they aim for a top-half league finish.

Gate travels to #14 Castle Rolf for their last outing on Sunday.  They could retake 5th place from East Coast Diesel, cannot finish lower than 6th where they stand now.

Isle of Sodor Premier League – IN REVIEW – matchday 35 (5/11-12): Down to three in title hunt, more Relegation do-si-do

Image result for English Premier League trophyThe Isle of Sodor FA congratulate their English Premier League cousins on a stellar finish to a captivating season!   Manchester City ran the table after 1/29.  One-loss Liverpool finished as the runners-up with most points in EPL history.  Gofightwin.   Now, IoS PL have their own high drama to complete!

Tied-for-1st Peel Godred and Dryaw had home matches against Relegation candidate clubs they were expected to win.  The weekend’s Feature Match was #3 Knapford Town hosting the tougher #7 outfit.  Could KTFC keep  presumed pace two points back of  the co-leaders?

Here are the updated table and weekend results:

Sat., 5/11
T1   Dryaw                         2   vs.   0       #19  Tidmouth City
#11  Marron                      2   vs.   0      #20  Arlesburgh Utd.
#3   Knapford Town     11   vs.   5        #7  Wellsworth
T1   Peel Godred              7   vs.   3       T17  Ulfstead
#9   Glennock                  4   vs.   4      #14  Castle Rolf

Sun., 5/12
#12  Vicarstown              8   vs.   5      #16  Brendam Utd.
#15  Brendam Harbor   7   vs.   0     #8    East Coast Diesel
#10  Suddery                   12   vs.   4     #6    J&S
#13  Lakeside                  12   vs.   3      #5   Crovan’s Gate
T17  Ffarquhar                 3   vs.   1       #4   Kirk Ronan

Review Highlights

* Top three remain the same. #3 Knapford Town puts on an offensive clinic in beating #7 Wellsworth.

* We bid farewell to #4 Kirk Ronan as a title contender. Another loss has left them eight points behind the league leaders with just three Matchdays remaining.

* It was Ffarquhar that beat KRFC. The win vaults them out of their former tie on the Relegation line with weekend losers Ulfstead and ahead of losers Brendam United as well.

Feature Match in Review

Image result for Knapford Town FCLet’s hear it for the grounds crew at Knapford Town, credit them with this W!   Their pitch was not soggy as some others.   Last Wednesday, a storm swept over the entire Isle, leaving pitches waterlogged.  Noob predicted a 2-2 draw in the Matchday Preview post largely based on that.

But the aeration program KTFC‘s pitch caretakers put in place has been second to none!   Couple that with the fact that the underlying ground isn’t as clayey as many parts of Sodor and the pitch and conditions weren’t terribly sodden, if hardly dry.

PictureWellsworth practiced on the field, but didn’t fully process just how OK the pitch was going to be by kickoff.   They were in their poor-weather cleats.  KTFC – in their standard gear – ran absolute circles around them, figuratively and sometimes literally, scoring from all over their offensive third.  When halftime and a chance for the visitors to change into proper footwear arrived, they were already down 7-0.

Three Matchdays to go!     The FA have made a slight adjustment to the remaining sched:

Matchday 36      Sat./Sun.      5/18-19
Matchday 37      Wed.               5/22
Matchday 38*    Sun.               5/26

* previously, the matches were to be Sat./Sun. this weekend

Fin.

Isle of Sodor Premier League matchday 34 (5/4-5) Sunday recap: The unbearable tension mounts!

First, nuts and bolts.  Here is Saturday’s recap.  And here are Sunday’s results:

T17  Ulfstead          0   vs.   2      #6  Junction & Sheds
#8   E.C.D.                2   vs.   5     #12  Marron
#1   Dryaw               3   vs.   3     #10  Suddery
#3   Peel Godred   2   vs.   0      #9   Glennock
#12  Lakside           3   vs.   5     #18  Brendam Utd.

We’ll recap that bolded Feature Match in a bit.  Where does the weekend madness leave everything?    Here’s a smexy link to the updated complete table.

Image result for madness funnyWith four matches in this inaugural league season to go, we now have a tie atop the table!   More, there’s once again a tie for 17th, right on the Relegation line.  And remember, in IoS PL, even on points means even –  period.  No goal differential or other tiebreakers.   If needs be, tied teams will have a playoff match in Suddery at season’s end.

Image result for RelegationStarting at the bottom, Brendam United jumped back out of the Drop Zone again with a solid road win.    After Ffarquhar‘s home loss Saturday, fated favored B-Utd. again as Ulfstead couldn’t even score a goal at their own place.  The two losers sit on the Cutline, tied.

Image result for Peel Godred FCAt table’s top, a team other than Dryaw FC sit on the top line for the first time in months!  On a rainy day over most of the Isle that kept scores down, then-#3 Peel Godred scored two early, then played keep-away to win 2-0.

That meant Dryaw needed the full three points at home against Suddery to maintain their #1 solo status.    Here was Noob’s prediction to this Feature Match:

Noob’s call:     Dryaw haven’t overwhelmed teams all season long for the most part, so one fears them overly.   Suddery will have confidence after having beaten them in March and be no less comfortable wearing visitors’ kits today.    But with Wilbertson back, DFC won’t drop all the points.    3-3

Even former full-time website prognosticator Noobstradamus had to admit I nailed this one COLD.  

Image result for noobstradamus

 

 

Lucky schmuck.

 

The teams traded early goals and then that rain came in and made it tough on everyone.   Visiting Suddery led 2-3 heading into stoppage time, appeared set to sweep the season series from Dryaw and perhaps ruin their championship campaign.

Related imageBut after a week off with an injured neck, Dryaw star striker Christopher Wilbertson made his move on POTY!   Clearly not 100% yet, he struggled to contribute all match long.  Just couldn’t keep pace nursing that neck.   It took a corner kick set piece to give our hero his chance.

CW hung back at the edge of the box, understandably seeming to not want to risk further neck injury in the scrum up front.   But it was trickery!    Suddery made the mistake of leaving him completely unmarked and could only ogle in wonder after CW went charging to an edge for the tying header at 93′.  The late point earned keeps them even with PGFC.

Get ready for a wild and woolly finish, Noobites, Matchday 35 will be Wednesday with all 10 teams in action!   They’ll all play the next two Wednesdays AND weekends these last two weeks to finish the amazing first-ever IoS PL season.

Isle of Sodor Premier League – IN REVIEW – matchday 33 (4/27-28): title race tightens, Relegation moves

Nothing changed in the table’s top ten this weekend (except for a tie for 8th being broken).

Yet EVERYTHING changed in the table’s top ten this weekend.  Here’s a smexy link to the updated table, which is also always available under the “More Noobishness” Pages on this site.

Sat., 4/27
#3 Peel Godred               6    vs.    2    #19  Arlesburgh Utd.
#1   Dryaw                         1     vs.    6    #11  Lakeside
#7   Wellsworth            14    vs.   10   #16  Brendam Utd.
#6   Junction & Sheds   1    vs.   5    #8     E.C.D.
#17  Ulfstead                    1    vs.    0    #4    Crovan’s Gate

Sun., 4/28
#9   Glennock                    2    vs.    3   #5   Kirk Ronan
#2   Knapford Town       3    vs.    2   #12  Castle Rolf
#14  Brendam Harbor   3    vs.    7   #14  Marron
#20  Tidmouth City       5    vs.    6   #15  Vicarstown
#10  Suddery                     2    vs.    7   T17  Ffarquhar

Review Highlights

 * #1 Dryaw FC - minus freakily injured star striker Christopher Wilbertson  - lose again to Lakeside A.F.C. 

* #B Knapford Town and #3 Peel Godred each win, now trail Dryaw by just one and two points in the table, respectively. 

* Ulfstead and Ffarquhar both win, dropping Brendam United into the Relegation Zone.

Image result for Lakeside FC crestThe key match of the weekend turned out to be Dryaw’s home loss to Lakeside A.F.C.  The league leaders were missing star striker Christopher Wilbertson.  Was it the difference?   Hard to say.   Sodor’s “L.A.F.C” held them to just one goal in their other match this season, too.

Related imageSo what happened?  Dryaw kept their injury news on the D-L.   Not hard, considering Noob – your exclusive source for all things IoS PL – returned  stateside for Easter.)   It was holiday disaster for Wilbertson.

The club held an Easter egg hunt on the stadium grounds a week ago Saturday.   Wilbertson won.   And he celebrated as he celebrates everything, once again trying to perfectly re-create the famous Klinsmann Dive.  His luck finally ran out, as he whiplashed his neck to the point of needing over a week off.

Image result for Klinsmann dive sodorDoes Noob keep recycling the same photo for this guy, post after post?

Maybe Wilbertson just always does this exactly the same way.

 

Image result for soccer easter egg hunt

 

 

(But at least call the kids got participation prizes!)

 

 

Wilbertson is expected to return next week for Dryaw’s home match versus #6 Junction & Sheds.  Noob will have updates as warranted as I am returning to the Isle midweek.

’10 to Track’ Weekend Edition (6/23-24) soccer matches – World Cup, Isle of Sodor Cup, MLS, NWSL y mas!

Join Noob for ten of the most important soccer matches to follow for us – the newish American fans of the global game.  And for my on-site, seemingly exclusive online coverage of the inaugural Isle of Sodor Cup!

Saturday

  1. South Korea vs. Mexico – FIFA World Cup

South Korea lost their first match to Sweden here in Group, while Mexico stunned Germany 1-0.  They are ranked 57th and 15th in the world, respectively.

South Korea have a central midfielder who’s been playing for English Premier club Swansea City –Ki Sung-yeung.  Mexico may well decide to attack more from the edges so he’s not such a factor.

Mexico’s goal in Game One game from Hirving Lozano.  Can he strike again?

There you have it, Noobites!   Snack-sized preview to get you at least through water cooler chat.  noob will not have hurt feelings if you know go in search of even deeper pre-game analysis.  I’m going to certainly.  We learn, we grow.   (11:00 AM Eastern, Fox, Telemundo)

RESULT:   1-2   Mexico      No one is quite through or quite out yet, but these two are nearly so

Image result for water cooler chat funny

B.  New York Red Bulls vs. FC Dallas – MLS

Dallas have pulled into a tie for 1st place in the West with Kansas City.  Their five-match win streak is surely impressive.  It’s worth noting that the road wins have come against softer teams, because NYRB ain’t one.

Red Bulls bring the heat like anyone outside of Atlanta Utd.  They’re in 4th in the Eastern Conference, and have played one to three matches fewer than all the clubs ahead of them.  It’s strange.  They struggle some against teams from their region (except NYCFC), lay waste to most others.  If you like trends, put your money on the home side today.   (6:00 PM, Univision Deportes)

RESULT:   Red Bulls   3-0

Image result for letter B money

 

 

 

Number B, you are so money.

  1. LAFC vs. Columbus Crew – MLS

Our MLS undercard is hardly that as the conferences’ #3’s face off.

LAFC’s one recent league win was against league lowbies San Jose, and they needed two goals in the 90’ to achieve that much (3-4).

Columbus haven’t won since May, yet have mostly earned draws since that time to keep them well afloat in the table.  Their superb goalkeeping was bound to come back to earth a little after an amazing spring stretch. Can Zach Steffen recapture the magic?   (10:30 PM, ESPN+)

  1. Seattle Reign vs. North Caroline Courage – NWSL

It’s #B versus #1!   That will always have a certain luster.  Yet make no mistake, Seattle is a big underdog at home to the locomotive that is NCC.  The league’s only about a dozen games in and the Courage already lead by 11 points in the table.

Still, Seattle hasn’t conceded a goal in three straight matches, and NCC actually let lowly Houston draw with them their last match.

RESULT:   Courage   1-4

Image result for lost luster funny

 

 

Umm…thanks, Chuck!

  1. Junction & Sheds vs. Killdane – Isle of Sodor Cup

Junction & Sheds (Knapford) aren’t expected to be quite as strong as Knapford Town in the inaugural IoS Premier League coming in a few months, but they’ll be plenty competitive.  They’re one of three teams here in Group G with three points, so simply getting a draw today would hardly guarantee them advancement to the Knockout Round.

Killdane already knocked of a future Premier side in Ulfstead, so they won’t be intimidated.  Perhaps they should be though.  J&S won that first match of theirs by a Cup-largest margin of seven goals (1-8).  Killdane are expected to be a midtable side in the Second Division.

RESULT:   Killdane   1-5!     All of Group G is knotted up at three points apiece with just a match to go each.

Sunday

  1. England vs. Panama – FIFA World Cup

#55 FIFA-ranked Panama needs at least a draw to stay alive in Group G.  A win would guarantee #12 England advancement to the Knockout Round, though they’d need a big one to pass Denmark on goal differential for the Group lead.

England had a sensational first half against Tunisia, likely should’ve won by more than 1-2 as they did.   In all recent major tournaments, they struggle early and often, so “The Three Lions” are thrilled to have a W already.

Panama played a very, very physical style against Belgium, leaving things tied 0-0 at the half before Belgium solved them for a 3-0 win.  England should handle them, but this will be a different challenge presented.

Oh, and England’s coach dislocated his shoulder somehow.   And there you have it!  Mini-preview to get you through water cooler chat-level convo for tomorrow’s biggest WC match.  Now go, be free!  Explore more in-depth pregame schtuff if you are so inclined.  Noob will.  We’re all learning.   8:00 AM Eastern, FS1, Telemundo)

RESULT:   England   6-1

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  1. Atlanta United vs. Portland Timbers – MLS

Atlanta are perhaps the best team in all the league, and currently sit atop the Eastern Conference.  There can be little doubt Portland are the hottest team.  They had a rough start to 2018, but are now unbeaten in ten straight and are 6th in the West.

It’s the defense that’s got both clubs in playoff slots in the table.  The back lines are key for both sides.  Neither goalkeeper is in the top ten in saves, but ATL’s Brad Guzan has more in today’s matchup.  He played nine seasons in the English Premier League.  Can he keep a clean sheet today?   (4:30 PM, Fox)

RESULT:   1-1

  1. Kirk Ronan vs. Dryaw – Isle of Sodor Cup

Cabalnoo lead Group B, stunningly, are the only one of the four with a win.  All others have ties here, so if either can win this match outright today, we have a real race on our hands.

Dryaw had a weird, scoreless match with Norramby in their first and only match so far.  Defense isn’t a very Sudric thing in football.  Even given that, the ten goals Kirk Ronan conceded against Cabalnoo still has our heads shaking.  Perhaps at home the larger Churchmen club can right things.

RESULT:   Kirk Ronan   4-3

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Eeriest B&B in the world might be the original Ronan church (“kirk”) where Noob is staying.

  1. Kairat Almaty vs. Astana – Kazakhstan Premier

#B versus #1!   And in a way it’s even tighter.  Kairat Almaty are only five points behind the traditional league power and they’ve played two fewer games.  More, they’ve only lost once.  Astana has already taken two L’s.

Still, Noob’s not ready to call this one for the home team.  Astana would feel fine about a draw and can control the ball enough to get it.

RESULT:   Astana   1-2

  1. BATE Borisov vs. Shakhtyor Soligorsk – Belarus Premier

BATE is the historic great from this domestic lead, and they’re #1 again now.  But #4 Soligorsk have the best defense in the league.  BATE have to be favored, especially at home – and with the best offense to boot.  Still, this could end up the surprise upset of leagues today.

RESULT:   0-0

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If Noob weren’t in Kirk Ronan, Sodor for the Cup, I’d be saying, “So long from beautiful Barysaw, Belarus!”