10 to Track (Wednesday, 9/20/2017)

1. Sporting Kansas City vs. New York Red Bulls – U.S. Open Cup

The final! It’s a The Management dream, KC hosting ‘Muricuh’s FA Cup.    Unicorn-moonman trophy time!    Sporting Kansas City  2-1

Image result for most murican picture ever    THAT needs to be the trophy.

B. Atlanta United vs. L.A. Galaxy – MLS

It’s time to stop thinking about Atlanta as a mere expansion club. They’re in 5th in the Eastern Division, and the 7th-9th place squads are falling off the pace. Remember: Top six make the playoffs.  Atlanta climbs to 4th.   RESULT:  Atlanta 4-0

3. Toronto FC vs. Montreal Impact – MLS

Montreal is one of said teams falling off the playoff pace in the East. More bad news. Noobstradmus is having Canadiaian visions of a three-goal route by the league #1 hosts.   Impact now just three points out of 6th and the playoffs.   RESULT:   Montreal  3-5

Image result for visions of Canada funny    Official mascot of Canadiaian soccer battling.

[The three Copa MX games previously posted here have been postponed.   My thoughts and prayers go out to everyone effected by the massive earthquake.]

6. Gremio vs. Botafogo – Copa Libertadores

The first leg of this quarterfinal tie ended in a scoreless draw. Advantage, Gremio? Noob thinks not.    Winner gets to advance to semis.   RESULT:  Gremio 1-0

7. Lazio vs. Napoli – Serie A

Napoli finished 3rd and 5th last season, and sit #1 and #4 very early this season. And the Italians get four teams into next year’s Champions League instead of three did last year.    RESULT:   Napoli  1-4

8. Charleston Battery vs. Charlotte Independence – USL

South Carolina. North Carolina. Fiiight! And it should be a humdinger, as these sides are #2 and #3 in the East.   The Independence inch closer to catching the Battery for 2nd place.  RESULT:   Charleston 3-0

Image result for differences between north carolina and south carolina funny   Facts is facts, South Carolina.  Don’t blame Noob.

9. Seattle Sounders 2 vs. Phoenix Rising – USL

Another Amuricuhn expansion team on the go! Phoenix is in a dead heat with Tulsa Roughnecks for the last playoff spot (six get in) out of the West. But they’ve played two fewer games than Tulsa. And Seattle 2 is horrible.    Phoenix edges into 5th place.   RESULT:  Phoenix  0-1

10. Urawa Red Diamonds vs. Kashima Antlers – Emperor’s Cup

This is the FA Cup for Japan. Urawa got a really tough Round of 16 draw in league #1 Kashima, but at least they get to host the one-off match. Antlers will heed our Urawa cry – gym, tan, sushi!    Sadness reigns.   RESULT:  Kashima  2-4

Image result for pointing at stomach    The Situation is taking a Urawa game off.

This silhouette either indicates where the sushi goes or the last seconds before harikari.

Author: Soccernoob

After a year of previewing soccer matches the world over with my own off-brand comedy, I now provide exclusive coverage for the Isle of Sodor Premier League, Championship, and FA Cup. (FC Dryaw 'til I die.)

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